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Sounds like you are or were internally conflicted and possibly critical thinking and atheism caused internal stress to mount to the point of depression. Regarding supernatural experiences who knows. Seems many found , saw or heard God or a manifestation of it under distress. I would be curious to know if good psychiatrist would have been of help.
Faith is a powerful thing. Billions of people pray and believe in fairytales because it is more comforting than the brutal reality of our existence. . I would love to believe in a loving god and that one day all our suffering would end and we would have a permanent shitty grin on our faces in heaven by its side.
If finding a God improved your life awesome. if believing in fairytales made me happier I would too.
I stopped arguing with religious people for two reasons . First it I'd just as retarded to say with certainty there is no God as it is to insist there is. Major difference atheist do not kill millions, torture and brutalize or destroy those that disagree with them. The fact that god fearing people can justify maliciously killing innocent people by the millions kinda seriously makes me question the foundation of their morals. Also god is clearly indifferent towards human suffering. If something put all reality in motion we are simply manifestations of " IT " . Praying , sinning, divine intervention etc and projections and wishful thinking . IT does not care about us. IT is a concept our minds are not capable of comprehending.
I have never studied Islam. Never will. If there is a God it is not the ones man writes of. GOD is beyond our comprehension. The more we struggle to fit that concept into reality the more abstract god becomes.
You cant use logic and reason to argue against faith. For faith is the absence of logic and reason.
Not sure if you caught my video about my experiences with meditation under ACO 4-DMT. I will link you. IT is a long video and I really need to remake it sober so I don't ramble . https://youtu.be/PfCu3r6YWvo
